RANT AGAINST LAUNDRY
I hate laundry days more than anything in the world. To be specific, I hate folding the laundry almost as much as I hate unfolded laundry. I don’t iron, except in emergencies. One could say that I hate all household chores except pruning plants, which I can do for you if you trust me with the scissors.
Laundry is an endless chore. Dirty clothes breed at an astonishing speed. This is because we are obsessed with hygiene. Once upon a time, people didn’t obsess about hygiene so much. Does Clint Eastwood, for instance, change his clothes in High Plains Drifter? No, he takes a murky bath and slips right back into his unwashed clothes. To boot, he takes bath once and never more. True, he gets three pairs of new boots and a new gun belt (for free), but these items don’t need to be washed. By avoiding laundry and baths – hey, he doesn’t even go to the bathroom – Clint conserves water AND saves the environment from pollution. Plus, the lack of hygiene makes him healthier because his organism has adapted to cohabitation with ’em germs.
I like one particular moment in the laundering process, and it is when I am about one-third done with folding. Not when I am all done – by then, something is already gone. It may be confusing, but let me try to explain by analogy. Summer is my favorite season, and that’s why I prefer spring, and even mid-February, because once summer is here, it’s over before you know it.
That said, the end of summer brings back football season, and the end of laundry-lessness brings back another laundry day, so the analogy doesn’t really work. The laundry topic is truly depressing, so I’ll ditch it and, because it is , coincidentally, the end of summer, I’ll think football, leather and – of course – boots.
A CATALOGUE OF BOOTS
Ah, boots! Thirteen or more pairs hide in my closet. Until last year, there were more, but I gave them away on account of their heel height.
On the left are my favorite. They’ve survived pretty much everything, except that during a winter storm at Maverick’s I discovered they flood pretty easily. Many a time I’ve thought of replacing them but haven’t been able to find anything as sleek and comfy.
They are roomy and I can wiggle my toes in them. I like the radical shape, and the color is conspicuous. Just looking at them makes me smile. These are my Saturday teaching shoes.
I love high-heel boots but unfortunately can’t walk in them anymore. The ones I kept are relatively easy to wear and pretty. The lace-up pair on the far left – the one that looks twisted and sloppy – is in fact an extremely good-looking pair of boots. The zipper on the inside ensures that you don’t need to lace and unlace them every time (unless you like the extensive labor and the superb shape that results from it).
For apres-skiing, I have lace-up furry boots. Oh the pleasure of taking off the ski boots and slipping into those feet friends! Unfortunately, this particular pair seems to be approaching the end of its life. I’ve decided to keep them until I find the right substitute.
Then there are the ankle-high boots. The green-grayish Robin Hoods are like sneakers – I can run laps in them. The fold-up ones look great and feel great – that is, unless you wear them for an extended period of time. Then they hurt.
I rarely have buyer’s remorse, because I usually window-shop first, buying only what made me come back, at least three times. As a result of my shopping habits, I’ve missed a lot of good buys, which is far better than fighting off buyer’s remorse. The more I look at these wannabe expensive boots, the more determined I become to ditch them. Soon.
Finally, here are the two pairs I bought when I thought I’d be riding motorcycles. The tan ones I wear sometimes with jeans. The black ones saw some motorcycle action in a parking lot. Good-looking, sturdy boots (I also bought a heavy leather motorcycle jacket which I wear to Raiders games when it’s cold).
Salute to boots!