“Would you rather be mauled by a bear or by a tiger?”

This question was posed to me once, and I chose tiger.  Tigers, I was told, keep tearing you apart forever, but I am not planning to camp in Tiger County.  Bears, on the other hand, frequent camping sites that Jude and I have been discussing as possible: 

“I screamed, he bit harder, I screamed harder, he continued to bite,” said Deb Freele of London, Ontario, who woke up just before the bear attacked. […] Freele told interviewers that survival instinct kicked in, and she realized that the screaming wasn’t working. “I told myself, play dead,” she said. “I went totally limp. As soon as I went limp, I could feel his jaws get loose and then he let me go.”

I hate wildlife.  I am going to buy a bear spray and a gun – a .44 Magnum.  I’m gonna learn how to shoot.  And if I ever go camping again, I am going to keep my gun on my person, day and night.  If a grizzly attacks my tent, I am going to shoot her (or him).  I always thought that bears eat people if people infringe on their territory, so as long as you follow the rules of non-aggression, you’re safe.  But this here is really scary:

[I]t is clear the campers followed safety guidelines. Food was properly stored, and investigators doubt campers antagonized the bear. “This was really a predatory action for this grizzly bear,” said Jones, “she sought out these individuals just by chance.”

Here is a list of deadly bear attacks in North America.  A lot of the victims were partially consumed.  And this here is Yellowstone.net blog on yesterday’s grizzly kill – no one, not even the seasoned campers, really knows what ticks off those bears.


9 thoughts on ““Would you rather be mauled by a bear or by a tiger?”

  1. I love shooting. If you and “irruptor” ever want to go put some rounds in targets, let me know! I don’t think I could handle a .44, but I’m sure if you mastered Greek syntax a canon like that would be no problem for you!

    1. I’ve been to the shooting range only once and loved it, so yes, let’s go. Where do you shoot? We went to some place in the South Bay. I’ve only seen .44s in movies but am sure I’ll quickly learn how to squint.

  2. Mein Bruder ist ein grosser Animalophil. He told me that the campers encroached upon bear territory, and it was therefore their own action that got them mauled. He also cracked up at the thought of me with a .44.

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