While the Muse is preparing to visit Irruptor and Smintheus (OK, I like this name for Jeff), let me tell how smartness came upon me.
When I was 2, my parents took me to an upscale restaurant. At the time, they entertained various ideas about the most effective ways to raise me. One was that if their daughter ate brains, her brain will develop new wrinkles. So they ordered brains for me and made me eat it – me, a very dutiful child who’d never consider disobeying her parents.
I chewed and chewed, and swallowed occasionally, while my parents and their sophisticated friends held conversations on various lofty things. Just as I swallowed the last brain, I threw up and before anyone could intervene, I went under the table and started biting people’s legs. And ever since, I’ve been an uncannily clever communicator.